...I will die a lot earlier than anyone else around here:

"FINAL SETTLEMENT DATE: The Wednesday that is thirty days prior to the third Friday of the calendar month immediately following the month in which the contract expires ("Final Settlement Date"). If the third Friday of the month subsequent to expiration of the applicable VIX futures contract is a CBOE holiday, the Final Settlement Date for the contract shall be thirty days prior to the CBOE business day immediately preceding that Friday."

I have killed more brain cells trying to figure this out than I have on any three-martini Friday night. Somebody figure it out and respond.

Thanks, I've got a headache from trying to figure this out.

Here...these are a little easier, but not too easy.

First Question:

You are participating in a race! You overtake the second person. What position are you in?


scroll down



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second!


Now answer the second question,
but don't take as much time as you took for the first question, OK ?

Second
Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?
(scroll down)



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?



Third Question:
Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only .
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.



Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000 . Now add 30 .
Add another 1000 . Now add 20 . Now add another 1000
Now add 10 . What is the total?


Scroll down for answer.....



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Did you get 5000 ?



The correct answer is actually 4100.



Fourth Question:

Mary's father has five dau ghters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini,
4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you Answer Nunu?
NO! Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again!



Okay, now the bonus round:
A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By
imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is
done.
Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of
sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



He just has to open his mouth and ask...
It's really very simple....

I can add, I just don't pay attention to detail. Of all people...I thought at least you would be able to answer Clam's question.

I would never work anywhere with such wording in a contract. Just say'in.

Q1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms: The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?

Q2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?

Q3. A magician was boasting one day at how long he could hold his breath under water. His record was 6 minutes. A kid that was listening said, "that's nothing, I can stay under water for 10 minutes using no type of equipment or air pockets!" The magician told the kid if he could do that, he'd give him $10,000. The kid did it and won the money. Can you figure out how?

Q4. There are two plastic jugs filled with water. How could you put all of this water into a barrel, without using the jugs or any dividers, and still tell which water came from which jug?

Q5. What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and grey when you throw it away?

Q6. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?

Q7. This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it? It looks so plain you would think nothing was wrong with it! In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is unusual though. Study it, and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out! Try to do so without any coaching!


Now how many could you answer?
Scroll down for answers:-



ANSWERS:-

A1. The third. Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead.

A2. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry.

A3. The kid filled a glass of water and held it over his head for 10 minutes.

A4. Colour and Freeze them first. Take them out of the jugs and put the ice in the barrel. You will be able to tell which water came from which jug.

A5. The answer is Charcoal. In Homer Simpson's words: hmmmm... Barbecue.

A6. Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.

A7. The letter "e", which is the most common letter in the English language, does not appear once in the long paragraph

"FINAL SETTLEMENT DATE: The Wednesday that is thirty days prior to the third Friday of the calendar month immediately following the month in which the contract expires ("Final Settlement Date"). If the third Friday of the month subsequent to expiration of the applicable VIX futures contract is a CBOE holiday, the Final Settlement Date for the contract shall be thirty days prior to the CBOE business day immediately preceding that Friday."

I'll try to give it a crack:
does this help? press release

-Final settlement date:the Wednesday that is thirty days prior to the third Friday of the calendar month immediately following the expiring month.
taken from text in the release. This is the main math taken from the site.

I think you'll need a calendar in front you. I think what's tripping you up is you are taking 30 days literally, and I think it's figured differently than that. Find a calendar, circle the 3rd Friday,any 3rd Friday, count back 30 days (does that include weekends though?) find the Wednesday that is within that period, farthest away. I need AV here! November 16 is the 3rd Friday for November of 2007. The Wednesday 30 day prior to that would be October 17? right? Actually it's 31 days. But I believe that kinda how you can start. Then the rest of the paragraph would just shift the days counting back probably from a Monday. Christmas and Maybe Thanksgiving Friday are the holidays that come into play that I can think of.

I saw a PDF on this site that scared me called 'White paper'. Yikes. Had to dust off my high school math to digest some of those pages. This was pulled from the Q & A. Maybe you've seen this already.

QUESTION:
On VIX calculation, the white paper says that if the expiration is less than 8 calendar days to the nearest expiration date, it will "roll" to the second and third contract month. In that case, the second nearest date will be more than 30 calendar days (around 35 days), and the third nearest is about 65 days, how would you still calculate the 30-day VIX?

ANSWER:
The VIX index formula takes the situation described in the question into consideration. When the expiration of an option used to calculate VIX is less than 30 days away and the expiration of another option used to calculate VIX is greater than 30 days away, then the formula "interpolates" an estimate of a 30-day level of implied volatility. However, when both expirations are greater than 30 days away, then the formula "extrapolates" an estimate of a 30-day level of implied volatility. See the VIX microsite at help page herefor more information.

Man - No kidding!
You can always "ask the institute". They'll probably give you a decent answer in layman's terms.

So then...what is the expiration date? You promised the answer. WHAT IS IT???!!!

I hate the CBOE.

Expiration?? Don't know. Maybe you've been supplied that fact already and are missing it. Expiration date:The day on which an option contract becomes void. The expiration date for listed stock options is the Saturday after the third Friday of the expiration month. Does each stock have this date?


Settlement date: If it expired in October, then the October 17 date I mentioned is the answer. If it expires sometime in November, then November 21. I'm not sure how to answer the expiration date question. I don't think I'm helping you much anymore I ... have... failed.

You are a better person than I to dabble in the futures. That is very impressive to say the least.

LOL!

Somebody just asked me to sign off on an account where the guy had a net worth of $173,000.

Of that...$180,000 was the value of his home....cash was listed at $66.43 (not kidding), stocks/bonds/mutual fund holdings were $275.00 (really not kidding)....and credit card debt was about $7,300.

Do you think I was wrong for not signing it?

Again...my death will come sooner than yours.

And the guy next to me? Still chews with his mouth open. Sounds like a cat eating canned food.

quote:

Originally posted by Clamato:
Somebody just asked me to sign off on an account where the guy had a net worth of $173,000.

Of that...$180,000 was the value of his home....cash was listed at $66.43 (not kidding), stocks/bonds/mutual fund holdings were $275.00 (really not kidding)....and credit card debt was about $7,300.

Do you think I was wrong for not signing it?

Again...my death will come sooner than yours.

And the guy next to me? Still chews with his mouth open. Sounds like a cat eating canned food.

That's the last time I trust you with my personal financial information....btw, I fudged the equity in the home by about 200K.

quote:

Originally posted by Clamato:
Somebody just asked me to sign off on an account where the guy had a net worth of $173,000.

Of that...$180,000 was the value of his home....cash was listed at $66.43 (not kidding), stocks/bonds/mutual fund holdings were $275.00 (really not kidding)....and credit card debt was about $7,300.

Do you think I was wrong for not signing it?

Again...my death will come sooner than yours.

And the guy next to me? Still chews with his mouth open. Sounds like a cat eating canned food.

Welcome to the subprime lending market

quote:

Originally posted by Clamato:

And the guy next to me? Still chews with his mouth open. Sounds like a cat eating canned food.

My boss does that. You described it perfectly!