The divorced dad is in the medical profession...

I'm a divorced mom who has tried to keep my home in Glen Ellyn. I am worn out by all the acitivities at the school that working parents can't attend as well as so many during evening hours. The PTA has gone way overboard. This is "screen-free week." There are activities planned every night which are well advertised at the school and my kids naturally want to participate. Does the school honestly think my kids are spending their evenings watching television?!?! My duaghter has 2 hours of homework a night (4th grade) and needs to practice the piano and bass if she wishes to keep getting lessons. She is a Girl Scout. My son plays sports and is now playing baseball and catching up on practices 3 nights in a row.

No, I do not think Glen Ellyn is the best place for single parents or working parents. Being a single working parent.. well... I am looking at options.

Does anyone know anyone who wants to live in a single family home with a room-mate? I am dead serious. I have a bungalow with a fished basement family room, two small bedrooms (furnished with what I have if they want), a garage space, a large yard, a deck, and am walking distance to both College Ave. and Glen Ellyn train stations. Month to month or short term.

As a mother who works full time, and will continue to work full time, I find this post, which I somehow missed the first time around, very interesting.

I have not yet ventured into the world of D41, my oldest will be in kindy next year.

It sounds like the same old battle of stay at home vs. working mothers. It appears as if the stay at home contingent is allowed to flex their muscles a bit too much in some of the D41 schools. I have never been involved in a PTA (or should it be called MTA since I don’t forsee many fathers being able to make it to midday meetings), and don’t honestly know whether I would want to be an active member. But, if I do, I’ll either find something to do that will work within my available time constraints or, if nothing currently available is workable, I will push for change so that something is available. I recognize that I can’t have my cake and eat it, too – there are many positions and activities in which I simply will not be able to participate; I can’t be in two places at once. Part of the nature of being involved in a school is that some of the involvement will have to take place during the school’s regular operating hours.

But, either way, the world will continue to rotate on its axis whether or not I am President of the PTA. I can also guarantee that my children will not be participating in every activity that strikes their fancy. The sheer thought of it makes my heart pound; it’s just not part of my husband's and my long range child rearing strategy. I suppose I will not be one of the parents in the “in-crowd” in D41, but such is life.

OK getting off my soapbox . . .

As a stay at home mom for all of my kids' years of school (oldest a freshman), I want you to know that being a working mom won't keep you from doing most of what you and your child want to do. Your desires and your child's desires will lead you to be as involved as you want to be and everything will be just fine. We've all started making a career out of our children's activities and that's a shame for them and for us. Relax. Enjoy what you can and lose the guilt. The little rats will try to use it on you, but don't let them get to you. Teach them balance and the ability to enjoy what you're doing right this minute. It will serve them well for a long time.

As far as being one of the "in crowd", that is a full-time job in and of itself for stay at home moms and working moms. It never seemed that appealing to me.

quote:

Originally posted by CityGirl:
I'm a divorced mom who has tried to keep my home in Glen Ellyn. I am worn out by all the acitivities at the school that working parents can't attend as well as so many during evening hours. The PTA has gone way overboard. This is "screen-free week." There are activities planned every night which are well advertised at the school and my kids naturally want to participate. Does the school honestly think my kids are spending their evenings watching television?!?! My duaghter has 2 hours of homework a night (4th grade) and needs to practice the piano and bass if she wishes to keep getting lessons. She is a Girl Scout. My son plays sports and is now playing baseball and catching up on practices 3 nights in a row.

No, I do not think Glen Ellyn is the best place for single parents or working parents. Being a single working parent.. well... I am looking at options.

Does anyone know anyone who wants to live in a single family home with a room-mate? I am dead serious. I have a bungalow with a fished basement family room, two small bedrooms (furnished with what I have if they want), a garage space, a large yard, a deck, and am walking distance to both College Ave. and Glen Ellyn train stations. Month to month or short term.

I have more problems with my clients adjusting to this aspect of life than any other. A town like Glen Ellyn stratifies itself into 1)Married 2)Married with children 3)Single mom 4)Single dad 5)Renter But that is not unusual in these kinds of towns. You will find your circle of friends and you will be surprised at who they are, and who you can depend upon. Little...way knows what I mean.

Stay connected with Girl Scouts for what it is, rather than for what you get out of it. Your daughter will do well in that structure. Also, my kids play bass. The best is yet to come at Hadley for your daughter with Georgia Alemis - far and away the best thing about Hadley. Your kids are active in sports. Keep them that way. It's tougher as a single parent, and if your ex doesn't help, it's even tougher.

It's a whole new culture, and you have to adjust to the culture you are in. There's plenty of people in your position, or getting there. Find them and stay away from the bitter ones. And don't be surprised to know that there are many people who would like to be in your position if they had the chance. Even when they look down their nose.

Whatever you do, don't take on a roommate if you can avoid it.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: ronkas,

Ron, I'm wondering what kind of clients you have and if you are related to Bonnie. :-) My ex is involved 200%, but it is still more difficult on both of us that anyone can imagine until they've been there. I completely agree about Georgia Alemis. She is my duaghter's bass teacher in grammar school (once a week). Taking on a roommate would be for the purpose of keeping my home for a bit longer. I can count my Glen Ellyn "friends" on one hand with fingers to spare, and for just that I feel blessed.

quote:

Originally posted by CityGirl:
Ron, I'm wondering what kind of clients you have and if you are related to Bonnie.

She's a stunning blond.

BTW, the best bass instructor for private lessons is Virginia Dixon in Lombard. You're lucky your ex is involved. The kids gain so much from that kind of cooperation.

Okay, you must be a divorce attorney, and yes, she **is** a stunning blonde with an amazing personality to go with it. She was one of the Girl Scouts who didn't discriminate against those leaders who woked outside the home. Always liked Bonnie. I can't say that all of the GS powers that be have the same philosophy ;-)

Yes, Virginia Dixon is the only way to go. Beth Zaluba is another one but is in Oak Park.

I had the **worst** divorce attorney in DuPage county from Downers Grove. It was so bad that my husband's attorney told my husband that I was being ripped off! Nice to meet you, Ron.